We did have a great day on Monday - it was Patriots day here in MA so B was off school. She and I bought a large tent from a fellow in Holyoke, then we loaded the kayak on the car and met Sandy and Avy. Kayaking was the perfect activity in the 90 degree weather. The girls were muddy little wild things on the islands of the oxbow. The only thing that ruined the day for B was that I had to leave that night to teach.
Today was a home day but I felt compelled to do something. I started to clean our closet which put me in tears. I did manage to get some of Ruth's things bagged and downstairs. By that time Bennett was feeling better so we escaped to apply for her new passport. She bought a very pink envelope for Aunt Mary while at the post office and then she passed out in the car on the way home.
Ruth C and I had this crazy plan that we would go to Tai Chi in Northampton on Tuesday nights. Tonight was the first Tuesday. The plan was that B would hang out with RC while I took the early class the RC would take the later class.
Bennett just does not want to loose sight of me. She stayed for the entire class (did fairly well and everyone was amused by her giggles and retying my shoe in a large knot) until she got stepped on by one of the tai chiers. We left in tears hoping that we did not interrupt the class too much.
It is so hard to leave her - I need to dig out the jogging stroller. I have not run for three days. I took Sunday off because I was tired. Then I thought ok Monday is a holiday but today I should have put B in the stroller and run. My logic she was too sick but of course I dragged her out to get her passport done and to Northampton to a Tai Chi class - crazy mom - poor kid.
Hey, Pat! I think Bennett was great in tai chi class. Maybe it was a little too much for her when I got commandeered by teacher D to the other side of the room. I wanted to tell D I was busy with another job, but couldn't get it together. Anyway, I figure Bennett needed to tell us that she needed to do something else, and not having the opportunity to say it outright, she seized upon the opportunity presented by being bumped into! Brilliant person! I hope class was a little nice for you, and that next week is a little bit easier? I am sorry I will be out of town for a couple of days; I'm going to miss you guys. Perhaps I can get together with Bennett for lunchtime on Friday, if she doesn't have school?
ReplyDeleteHang in there. Lots of love to you.
Ruth
PS The title to your post is entirely inaccurate. Even if you feel a little crazy, you're not a crazy mom. I keep having so much respect for the ways you are being a mom, all the time.
ReplyDeletexo
Ruth
I agree! And you continue to be such an amazing friend, Ruth!
DeleteMom's sometimes go a little crazy, even as they're being good moms. I can't image you doing the things you're doing any other way. You're being so courageous and honest. And as always, I'm so happy you have your plethora of aunties surrounding you.
ReplyDeleteYou sound like an exciting mom to me, which entails a little craziness here and there. You guys will all over the place trying to get into some sort of new routine and then B will start a new school and you'll start a new work life and everything will change again. Life is crazy, not you!
ReplyDeleteWhat adventures you guys will have with your new tent! Some of our best family memories are from camping holidays.
I can't wait to get my pink envelope!
Speak soon - Mary
Monday nIght was fine. Bennett cried for a few minutes, but Ruth and I had fun playing with her in the bath, and Bennett and I giggled over story books and had a great conversation about the new puppies that ate going to be born in the next couple of days to Diane's dog. I can't wait to show her the puppies!
ReplyDeleteWe adore you Pat!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Mary: a slightly crazy mom is fun and memorable. A certifiably crazy mom, not so much (and you are not.)
ReplyDeleteIt was great fun paddling on Monday. Also memorable: the vision of those two wild things running about in the muck, fording the river, climbing on a fallen tree, refusing to listen to us. So happy and free (until the giardia, or whatever it was, struck).
Bennett had a nice time tonight. In your absence, she wanted to cuddle a lot and she and Avy both sat on top of me at Friendly's while Brad sat opposite, alone with his french fries. Poor guy.
Hope you both get some sleep tonight!
Sandy
Just figured out how to get directly to your blog so, I'm catching up.
ReplyDeleteI have a book in my head titled Mothering on the Edge. The premise of this book is how mothers look to the outside world and what really goes on in our heads.There are some wacky things that go on in the heads of great moms. It is so f-ing hard Pat. The most fulfilling thing in life but, hard. You are a great mom with a huge load right now. It will get better. Some day when Bennett is a young woman , there will be a day when you will find strength in her. It has happened now, several times, between Katie and me. For now just be silly and enjoy. Karen B