I have had so much support and help this last week from Aunties Ruth & Theo and Liz & Julie. Bennett slept over Friday night with Liz and Julie and tonight she is with Ruth and Theo. It is good and difficult to have a moment to let myself sit in the tiny backyard, look at the stars and cry.
I had planned so many things for this weekend -a trip to NY but I can only just get up and clean the kitchen maybe take the dog for a walk. I did make pesto, salsa and guacamoli for dinner at Ruth and Theo's (it was all in honor of RVE). There is so much at the farm that Ruth would have picked.
Now I realize she is gone. Ruth said to me a year ago in the spring this may be my last summer. I could not and did not want to believe that. How does that happen? Someone who is vital and shapes your life is gone.
I went to a concert friday with Ruth C and Theo. I thought it would be Nora Jones it was George Jones(ha). He was a very old country singer who had made an impact in his day but was beyond his time on stage. I could only think why is he still here? WTF. When someone so wise, sensitive and full of talent is gone? I am at a loss of generosity these days.
I have been running 2 miles yesterday - 3 the day before and some earlier this week - stretching often
Pat, thanks for letting us in on these reflections, on the depth of your sadness and mourning. I couldn't agree more with you. Much love at the end of the summer and on your beloved Ruth's birthday.
ReplyDeletePat, I feel like I haven't been in touch recently. Please know that I think about you, Bennett and Ruth all of the time. Every time I stop to savour a moment, I find Ruth in my heart so that I can share it with her. Lots of hugs and love, Mary
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