Timing

I actually thought we might make it to Fiji when I found some flights that came in around $3000 round trip for both of us.   Alas the timing is not good with Mary and her family.

It is so hard to think of Christmas without Ruth and the past few years we had spent time with Mary's family.  So much to let go of - I guess we have to make our own traditions.

I went to see Nancy today thinking I would get acupuncture but there was too much to work on in my heart.  It was a big step for me because I am somewhat anti-therapy.  We talked about asking for help  - which I hate to do - I would rather go eat worms.  

Ran 3.5 miles both Monday and Tuesday - hope to get to the gym today

horses

Bennett brushed, put a lead on and rode this horse today.  He is a gentle soul that was worked much of his life in the show ring.  Bennett was scared when she was riding with help.  I tried to tell her that I am scared as well.

She seems to love the interaction with the horses.  I think this will help her hold her head high and understand that compassion and connection are very important.

hacked

I tried to get my email back but finally dumped it today.  I am sorry for any lack of communication apparently none of my emails were going out.

We went to Bennett's kindergarden open house last night.  She led me around the room showing me all of the great work she has been doing in school.  I am so glad we went even though she fell asleep in the car on the way home (she was so tired).  Our little camera is not working - I have to get another missing so many great moments.  Ran around the reservoir Monday - yesterday ran at the gym - hopefully I will go to the reservoir again today.

Amazement

My email was hacked this weekend.  It made me feel like an idiot.  Sorry to all that were spammed.

Bennett did so many amazing things this weekend!  She started working with horses on a farm,   brushing, leading and feeding them.  We also went to the garden where Bennett shared photos of our family with the group of adults and children who have lost a family member.  She is so far beyond me- I will follow her in amazement.

Beautiful Bennett

B with Zoe

Beautiful Bennett - how is it that she is my daughter?

I went on the school field trip yesterday to the pumpkin patch.  Another field trip fiasco - B ran off toward the busy road when we arrived.  All the other children lined up obediently.  What do I inspire in her?  She begs for me to go on the field trip then proceeds to be miserable for 50% of the time.  It was a great trip regardless the baby cows were especially sweet.  One of the very nice moms who was on the trip said that we both had broken hearts - true.

Mary sent us a nice note.  This reminds me that B allows me to go to work to make money so we can go to Fiji (that is her reasoning).  The tickets are more than I make in 5 months.  How do you explain that to a 5 year old?  She is getting good at counting she announced this morning that 3 and 10 make 13.

No Aunties this weekend!  Ruth C. is away and Liz and Julie are busy- help!  Perhaps I will appeal to Aunt Theo that this is her chance to spend quality time with B.  Time to go to the gym.

Mushrooms

lion's mane

 Mushrooms are everywhere.  The rainy cool weather has brought them out in droves.  I have mushrooms in my freezer, refrigerator, on the counter and in both cars.  Time to have a party.

Bennett and I have been enjoying our hikes in the woods.  We had a very pleasant house guest Maisy (a dog) for a little over a week.  B is thriving in school.  Her language has expanded and she seems much more engaged in the world.

 We were supposed to start horseback riding this past weekend but she refused to go with Aunties.  I had a welding job that needed to be done so was unavailable to take her.

The garden (a bereavement group for kids and their family) starts this Sunday.  At least I think it will - I was given a schedual saying it was to start in September but it did not. Crossing my fingers.

hen of the woods

I ran 3.5 miles today - I have been running about 5 days a week either 2 or 3 miles on average a day.  I still feel my hip and foot get cranky around 2 miles.  Ruth C suggested I may have some common foot problem.